First Night Back
by Xuqra
Summary: Harry's back at Grimmauld Place and some things have changed, but more things are going to change.


The raven haired boy stood in the hallway, his hair as messy as ever. He had arrived at Grimmauld place only an hour ago, when the older shaggy haired man had told him to contact his friends, "You can floo them if you want, I'm sure you've want them to come as soon as possible." Harry had nodded ecstatically, he couldn't wait to see his best friends again; nor did he want to stay at this house by himself.

Lupin hadn't told him much about why he had been picked up from the Dursley's so quickly, but after only a week of hell he wasn't going to be the one to complain. He had been forced to think about Sirius and the prophecy, but that wasn't all that had happened. He thought about the danger he had put his friends in, and how good it had felt to talk to Luna about what happened with his beloved godfather. She had sent him an owl or two, but they usually asked about Ron and he sorely detested not being able to tell her the situation.

Lupin put a hand on Harry's shoulder, "you okay?" He must have been standing there thinking for a while causing the worried expression on his father's friend's face. He just nodded and headed to the kitchen to use the fire; he could just imagine seeing his godfather kneeling like he was, talking to him at school. A tear rolled down his cheek before he shook his head and threw the green powder into the fire, and he pushed his head into the soft green flame. An unnerving sensation took his body for a ride, seeming as if his head was spinning off and back on. When he opened his eyes again he was staring out of a fireplace looking at his two best friends, Ron's red hair had grown out and Hermione looked quite charming with a book in her hands.

"Ron, do we have to talk about this again?" She sighed looking up from the book; Harry was about to interrupt but he was held back by a tingling feeling in his stomach. He thought that maybe Lupin was messing with him, he did have an odd sense of humor, or maybe it had to do with the floo network. Either way he decided to listen more before interrupting.

"I'll keep bringing it up till you answer me," Ron looked at her intently. He must have grown an inch or two in the last week but the scars on his arms still hadn't fully healed.

"Oh, Ron! I don't know if it's a good idea. You know we fight so much," she looked at him, still unaware that Harry was listening to them from the fireplace. Her face seemed to be darkened, as if she was afraid of what was going to happen.

"What do you mean? We don't fight." He scoffed, as if the idea of yelling at her was vulgar and impossible. She just shook her head and looked back at her book again, but then he reached over and snatched it from her, "you'll have to tell me an answer if you want this back." He held up the book in the air shaking it back and forth.

"Honestly Ron. You're being a child," she looked out the window, "what about Harry?"

Ron scoffed again, "What about him?"

"He's our best friend; don't you think he'll feel left out?"

"He's going to get together with Cho, we'll be the only ones left out." He coughed apparently giving a nasty look up towards the stairs. Then he looked back at her, "and even so, Harry's used to being the lonely type. You know, he's always tring to push us away and all."

Just then a hand on Harry's shoulder pulled him back through the fire, "you shouldn't stay in there too long." Lupin was standing over him now, "someone might reach through and grab you. Many people have gotten into a lot of trouble being pulled through those." When Lupin had said this Harry was immediately reminded about the incident in Gryffindor tower when Sirius had almost been grasped by Umbridge. He gave an involuntary shiver.

"Well, you tell them to come?" Lupin said after a moment of silence. Then he remembered why he had originally gone through, but he had to think of an excuse so Lupin wouldn't think he was being a snoop.

"Oh, no. I couldn't rouse anyone. I suppose I'll just owl Ginny or something," he didn't even know why he had suggested Ginny. After being so unsure of what Ron and Hermione had been talking about, he wasn't really sure he wanted to see them anymore. Ron had said some harsh things, and what was he pestering Hermione about?

"Alright," Lupin said nodding his head. "I'm going to go up to the library, let me know if you need anything." The elder man looked better than he did when he saw him at kings cross. He must have been able to get over Sirius' death, Harry thought.

"Thanks," Harry said standing up, "for picking me up and everything. I'm glad to be away from there." Lupin just nodded again and walked out of the kitchen. Harry quickly walked to his room and took out a scroll and a quill and wrote a short note to Ginny and told her that he was there and she should tell the others that they were welcome to come.

When he went to tie the note to Hedwig's leg she hooted softly looking at the note, in a fairly neat scrawl it said Ginny clearly on the front. "I know; it's for Ginny. You're not used to delivering to her." The owl blinked its eyes twice, "I don't know girl, and I just think that I should leave them alone for a bit." The owl hooted again, this time louder and nipped at his fingers affectionately as he gave her a stroke down her back. Once he had opened the window, his bird jumped up and flew away.

He sat down on his bed, "Sirius' bed." Lupin had insisted that Harry move into the larger room, explaining that he would need his privacy this summer, and that he would find out more sometime later. He hadn't thought much of it at first, but now he really wished that he could go back to his and Ron's room. Life had been simpler then, he didn't have this prophecy, he didn't have to become a murder. He lay back and his head hit something on the bed; he quickly turned over and pulled back the sheets to reveal a mirror. The second mirror to his, Sirius had kept it in his bed? Or just left it there for him to find later?

He ran a hand down the side of the mirror, its wood frame firm and dark. He flipped the mirror over, not able to look himself in the face. On the back was a piece of paper, it was folded neatly and taped to the wood. In messy letters, his name was written on it, Sirius must have written it before he… before he was gone. Harry pulled the note off the frame, not sure if he wanted to open it quite yet. Had his godfather planed for this?

Shaking his head again, he unfolded the note and read it carefully. Then he skimmed it over again, and then again. He picked up the mirror it had been attached to and launched it across the room shattering the face. "You know its bad luck to break a mirror?" a soft voice drifted from the doorway, Hermione was staring at him gently when he looked up. He turned to try to hide the tears that were streaming down his face.

"Go away," he choked on the verge of really crying. Before he turned around to look back at the doorway he felt a soft hand on his back. The soothing motions of circles were flattened onto his back; he was enjoying her touch and her sensitivity.

"Harry, I'm here for you. Please talk to me," she said and Harry sighed under the tenderness her hand was applying to his back. She began again, "Luna sent me an owl a couple days ago, and she told me you two were talking. I don't want to make you go to someone else; I know I don't have the experience with it but…"

Harry turned to look at her, a small smile played through his tears; he pulled her into a tight hug, he had never really mentioned it before but he was very glad to have her for a friend. "He knew what was going to happen," Harry finally sighed after a few minutes of breathing in the soft cherry and orange scent of her hair. When she pulled away he was almost sad, but she wiped away his tears and smiled at him.

"And I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be sitting her crying about him," He looked away frustrated. Of course he wouldn't want to be cried over, Sirius wouldn't want anyone to cry over him. She spoke again, "I'm sorry that I wasn't able to, be there when it happened."

Harry looked at her again, "I'm sorry that you got injured. I'm so sorry that I didn't owl you to ask you how you were doing." It had been his fault he couldn't protect her, everything was his fault. He was going to own up to it, and not be frightened of it.

"Harry, it's not your fault." She seemed to know what he was thinking more than she should, but he just shook his head.

"It is my fault, and it will be my fault that no one will ever have to fear that… DEVIL again." Harry's words were dipped in acid, but she looked like she wanted to tell him off for it.

"Harry, you know that Dumbledore will take care of everything." Harry gave a chuckle though, and it plainly threw her. She looked confused for the first time ever, and what a sight it was with her face screwed up and cinnamon eyes searching his face. It only caused him to laugh a bit louder, but more sarcastically.

"Ah, you shouldn't put such faith in him." She looked at him very concerned now, "after all. He's the one that's caused me so much pain, don't you see? He knew what had to be done and he couldn't even tell me what it was."

"What? What do you mean? What has he told you?" She briskly shot off.

"The prophecy," he coughed after saying it. Was he going to tell her? What should he say? How would she react? Would she think him a murderer? Would she still like him? Would she still want to be friends? The questions were burning in his brain as he studied her eyes, his face no longer cynical but worried about what was going to happen.

"He knew what it was?" Harry only nodded when she asked this time her hand reached out and touched the exposed skin on his shoulder from his oversized shirt. The warmth from her hand seemed to radiate through his body and he felt the urge to tell her what had transpired.

"He was the one told it by Trelawney. The prophecy said that Voldemort would mark me as his equal," he paused only to look down at his hands in his lap, "and that I would either be murdered by him, or that I would murder him."

She gasped and pulled him into a hug, he felt like he wasn't able to breathe but he didn't want to. There was a cough from the door and Hermione pulled away from him, a tear was slowly creeping down her face but she wiped it away quickly before turning to the doorway. Ron stood looking at them, "Harry mate. Lupin finally told me where you would be." He looked from Harry to Hermione, "Took me an hour to find out where you were; how'd you find him so fast 'Mione?" Harry coughed. Ron turned his gaze back to the boy with the scar.

"Ron, it's good to see you mate." Harry said and grinned, standing up from the bed. It must have brought him back to reality because Ron grinned again looking at his best mate through unclouded eyes.

"Hey! You want to go bother Ginny? Or play exploding snap?" Ron said grinning. Harry's eyes wondered to the broken mirror the covered the floor opposite where they were standing.

"Exploding snap sounds like a plan," Harry patted his friend on the shoulder and Ron turned to leave. Harry looked back at Hermione, another tear was sneaking out of her eye but she quickly wiped it away. She tucked back a strand of hair and she smiled, and followed them out the door.

They walked down to one of the areas they had cleaned out the previous summer, Ginny was already there writing a letter. Ron grinned at the opportunity to hassle his sister, "who are you writing to Gin? Better not be a boy." She looked up momentarily and then back to the paper.

"No, it's to Luna if you must know." Ginny looked as pretty as ever, her long red hair made her look a little wild. What she said reminded Harry that Hermione said she was in contact with Luna as well, had everyone been talking to her?

"Ugh, I don't understand why you all talk to that bat." Ron said. I guess that answers that question, Harry thought. "She's crazy and she keeps sending me chocolate frogs, says that they'll be good for my scars or something."

Ginny giggled and winked at Harry, but he wasn't sure he got the joke. Hermione must have known but she was blushing and not giggling; what was going on? He made a mental note to ask both of them what they talked to her about all the time, it couldn't possibly be about Sirius. Was it about him? Or could it be about… Ron?

Ron had pulled out the game and was setting it up when Hermione had wondered over to a couch and pulled out a book. Ron looked frustrated, " 'Mione come sit next to me."

"Ron don't call me that," she sighed and looked out the window almost as if she knew what he was about to say. Harry wondered when Ron had started calling her by a nickname; another thing he would have to ask her about later.

"I can call you what I want, you're my gir.." but Ron stopped mid-word. Harry had dropped his jaw, and Ginny shot a look towards the couch where Hermione was sitting. She had shot up, and proceeded to briskly walk towards the door; fresh tears seemed to be running down her face.

Harry looked at his friend, but he just shrugged and looked away blushing. Harry couldn't let his best friend go cry after she had just comforted him; so he got up and walked out of the room trying to find his best female friend. It didn't take him long the sobbing noises led him to her destination; she had made her way back into his room. "I didn't think you would look for me here."

"Hermione, tell me what that was all about? There's something going on that you're not telling me. I know that he was rude but you normally just yell back at him," he grinned sitting next to her and lifting her chin to look at him.

"Harry, things are different. I…" she stuttered, "Ron and I are dating. Or were dating at this point, I can't believe he would say such a thing to me. I didn't want to…" His eye must have betrayed him, because his stone face didn't reveal the pain that was aching within him. "I know this must be a lot to deal with, I'm sorry if you feel left out."

"That's what you were talking about?" he choked. He didn't know what to say, they had done this behind his back. Well, in front of him but he didn't really know what was happening.

"What? When?"

"In the living room, before you got my owl. I had used the floo network to try to contact you but…" again he tried to dodge the questions by looking away; he didn't want to sound too much like he was snooping.

"Oh my god, how much did you hear?" she didn't seem concerned that he was snooping on them, but merely about how he reacted to it.

"Ron was saying something about me pushing you all away," Harry thought about what his friend had really said for the first time since hearing it. He thought his eyes might betray him again so he closed them, but that didn't stop the tears from forming at his eyes.

"Harry, I'm so sorry. He didn't mean it like that," she tried to console him. "He was just annoyed that you hadn't contacted us at all since you went home and you didn't try to talk to us on the ride home."

"You know why I pushed you away?" Harry said the frustration breaking his voice. He opened his eyes to look into her soothing eyes; she reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder again.

"Because you were mad at us?"

He shook his head slowly, "after I found out about the prophecy and after Sirius… was gone. I thought you all would hate me for what I had to do." He looked down at his shoes when he was done.

"Harry, you know that we will always stand with you. You won't be a murderer, you'll be a savior. So what if you have to kill one person in order to save millions, he's an evil man."

"You could kill one man? Evil or not, he's still human." Harry's eyes were tearing up again.

It was Hermione's turn to lift his chin, "He is not a man. No human could kill hundreds of other humans on a whim like he does. I refuse to believe that he is human, and thus you will not be killing him." She thought about it for a second searching his eyes, "think of it as removing a curse on the human race."

He looked into her eyes; she was smiling now, hoping that he would smile back. He was too lost in her beautiful brown eyes to think about what he would need to do in the future.

He smiled, how did she know that this is what he needed? He sighed, "I just don't want you to get hurt."

"I know you don't want anyone to get hurt," she said. Their eyes seemed to be drawing them closer.

He didn't know what he was doing but he was leaning forward, "I would do it just for you." Then their lips met, and warmth from her touch radiated through him. He didn't seem to have any worries left, he would defeat Voldemort for her.


End file.
